Winter Is Here, Damnit.

Winter on the carriage is not the most engaging time of year for a Memphis Carriage Driver. The bright lights of Christmas, the fun of Thanksgiving, these things help ease the blow of what every carriage driver here in Memphis knows: the cold is upon us. After the joy of the holiday season is put away until next year and Thanksgiving is just a meal you had on a Thursday, January and February descend. Besides Valentine's Day, it is a bleak and lonely time, chock full of rejection, wind and no money. Precautions have to be taken lest depression enter an already bleak time. It takes longer hours of work to make half the amount of money as the rest of the year and those two months are just around the corner, leering at poor, unsuspecting carriage drivers, ready to shred our financial plans, our morale and our overall sanity to shreds. Of course, Spring will bring back the good times- the Elvis Lovers, the spring breakers, Music Fest and all that, but for now, those are the things of myths. They don't seem real and all that does seem real is that brisk wind when you work all day or all night two blocks from the Mississippi River. "Do you all work 365 days a year?" I am asked quite often. It feels like it.One day at a time, eh? :)

Why Lie?

After careful consideration, we have decided that the next time some guy who is aware that he isn't going to take a carriage ride the night I ask him to, and is, furthermore, aware that I am aware a ride isn't going to happen, yet still says,"Sure, just not now, maybe later." will be seen as a problem in need of attention and will be dealt with. The fact is, sir, your days of lying are over because I next time you lie to me, I am going to call you out in front of God, your lady friend and everyone for the sole purpose of saving your eternal soul. "Why lie, man?" is what I'm going to say. Why lie to other people, especially about commerce? I don't mind rejection, I can't. In fact, I have to use it to my advantage and let it fuel the fires of things like courage and confidence. "I don't care if you go home and starve tonight and your animals as well."- that I can handle, a straight up,"No." But a "Things are looking up for you because yeah, I can see us doing business in the future and probably tonight!" with not an element of truth in it is a lot more harsh than "I don't care if you've been driving for forever, you can't attract a ride tonight if your literal life depended on it." That's called Reality, Mr. Lying Man About Town, and I much prefer it to a bold-faced lie like the one you tell me when you bs me about a carriage ride. I choose not to be involved with lying if I can help it and I can help it. I can get you to realize that whenever you are ready to conduct business, you know where to find me. In the mean time, if you insist on rejecting all that is sacred and true on this plane of being, Ultimate Truth, well, I chose to embrace the concept of Honesty, all the time, and those that don't, well, I have no use for them.At this point, I don't even think I want you on my carriage. Redeem Yourself, Dear Sir! Go away from the naysayers of goodness and embrace proper manners in life. Straighten up your back and speak words that leave little doubt as to their truth. Say "Yes" when you mean yes, "No" when you mean no and in all manner of things, be honest.

The Present Moment: America's Most Precious Resource

I officiated my first wedding this past Saturday night. The couple, Deb and Steven, got engaged on my carriage about six months ago and after all the oohing and ahhing, I mentioned that I was thinking about getting ordained to perform marriages. Well, they called me and asked me to officiate at their wedding at the end of October, so I became ordained and am now a Spiritual Minister. (I've been walking around laying my hands on the shoulders of my friends and telling them they have had the laying on of hands. Come to think of it, most of them probably have no idea what I'm talking about because that is a bit of a Catholic thing, if I'm not mistaken. It's been a while).Anyway, I  offered for us to trailer a horse and carriage out to the county where they lived for the wedding and they were excited. So, we brought Bonnie, one of only two Clydesdales downtown and who I drove for four and a half years and a big, ole Cinderella carriage and headed out of the city. It was a welcome change from the regular attempted solicitation of rides all night. The wedding got started about thirty minutes late but it was so beautiful out in Tipton county; the Mississippi River was about a mile away and in between was what I think is called a flood plain. It was behind the house and, in fact, in front of which I stood to marry these lovebirds, and from where we were, it was a humongous bluff. Looking out, you saw the tops of the very tall trees and beyond that was the bird's eye view of an October patchwork of countryside; fields and fields of varying colors as far as the river. It was stunning, though windy and as the sun went down, colder. The bride had told me she was wearing a strapless dress so I debating taking my overcoat off, which was the only thing keeping me from shivering.The plan was a short carriage ride up to the sunset wedding site with all the bridesmaids and the bride. I figured I would wear the coat till I got to the sit and take it off while doing the ceremony. I didn't want to look all bulked up and wintery when the bride is standing there in a light dress. However, my trailer reservation partner, Tim, said,"Y'now, sometimes you have to look out for number one." I agreed and left my coat on, covering up the outfit I had spent time putting together but I was so glad I did because it only got colder as the sun went down and I still shivered a little during the ceremony. It was so beautiful to be standing so close to the two people that all the other people had so willingly and happily come from far and wide to be witnesses to the beginning of their marriage. I am a big fan of marriage (though a child of divorce after 24 years)- I  am a very happily married woman!  When I was younger, it seemed like not very many people in this country were religious. That has changed these days and I am glad it has because it offers me the opportunity to be involved in weddings without being a planner. But I still get to be involved in it and I loved it. I was surprised how moved I was by the excitement and I was right in the thick of it, so it was total fun. Wished them a happy, healthy, long marriage and we loaded Bonnie back up and set off for Downtown. Can't wait for the next one, I hope it's soon! Until later, stay well. :)

And Now For Something Completely Different...

Whether you think Obama is a socialist or not, I have one reason why a one-world government, which, correct me if I am wrong, is a very close relative of socialism, is such a disastrous idea: c. Say there was a one-world government and it fell into the wrong hands. Say they were evil hands and don't try to tell me that it couldn't happen because obviously, governments can fall into the wrong hands. Say the world fell into the wrong hands and someone decided that they were sick and tired of humans and all our constant whining about wanting peace, harmony, human and civil rights and just decided to, for instance, let the world get as bad as it can and we all kill each other off. Then they create a whole new strain of human- clones. And while they are in there messing around with human DNA, they make a few alterations, creating beings to their liking. I would think that a cloned human would have a justified feeling of innate separatism, an ingrained notion of being not of God, not of nature. And rightly so, they would not be of nature or God. So you get rid of all the people and repopulate with clones and bingo- no more problems. Factories run for 14 hours a day without complaint, the environment becomes whatever the powers that be want it to be, without complaint, the work force become human-like beings that consider themselves robots. And the few at the top, the remaining actual humans, go about their days, happy as clams, rich as can be and just not giving a rat's ass. That is just one reason a one-world government is such a bad idea. That and the fact that there would be no where to run. If something happened and you had to run with your family, there would be no where to go, no where to hide. Can you imagine? Good God.

Magic Beer

There is a guy sitting at a bar and he tells the bartender he wants a Magic Beer. The bartender serves him up one and the guy drinks it down then gets up and flies around the room several times. A woman witnesses this and tells the bartender she wants a Magic Beer, too. "Hell, make it two!", she tells him. She downs both beers, goes outside, finds the tallest building, leaps off of it and SMACK, hits the ground and dies.
The bartender looks at the Magic Beer guy and says,"Y'now, you can be a real asshole when you're drunk, Superman!"
:)

Everyone has a philosophy, right?

Well, I am officially a bad, bad blogger. I mean so well by this blog. I think about it a lot but I haven't had a blog in a long time and am clearing out space for this blog so it can grow. This blog needs to mature, it needs to express, it needs carriage rides! This time of year, they grow scarcer and scarcer, so I got a part time job to go along with my dwindling carriage rides. Autumn is also the time of year that rejection takes on a whole new meaning on the carriage line. When you ask people if they want a carriage ride and it's cold out, they look at you like you asked for a kidney. No preface, just desperate,"Hey, man- you! Hey, can you donate a kidney to me, man? I really need it and I'd really appreciate it!" They rush away from you like you were homeless and annoying. Unless the people you solicited are from Northern Climes or drunk, in which case a big blanket is enough incentive for a cooler ride. The fun is just getting started here in Memphis as we've had a few November days here recently, one of which I got to drive in, in the rain. Perhaps this blog will create room for lots of sanity for a carriage driver in the winter in a city where we have agreed there must be carriages on the street 365 days a year, unlike the companies I've seen online. They work Saturdays in the colder months. Not us, no, not one December birthday nor February anniversary will go without it's carriage ride, not here in Memphis, no sir. No, here in Memphis, we carriage drivers take care of our citizens! We make sure that  ''Im sorry', 'I love you',  or 'I miss you' are a little more meaningful and and 'I would love a carriage ride!!', a desire fulfilled.

Concentration and mental toughness are the margins of victory. 

-Bill Russell

Until next time.

\

 

How about this...

God sleeps in the minerals, awakens in plants, walks in animals, and thinks in man. 
Arthur Young 

I had a woman on my carriage recently who was a medium from Montreal. She has her own television show in Buffalo, NY and she and her male companion seemed very in touch with 'the other side'. I told her my husband's father died many years ago and she claimed that his soul was on my carriage, that s

he had goose bumps from it. She said that whenever you mention people who have passed, that it's like you are calling them on a phone and that they show up immediately. She also said that if you want a sign that the spirit you want to talk to is around, that people who have died have easy access to electronics and can easily mess around with electronic devices. I told her I would email her when I got home so she could include me in her prayer circle. You can never have too many people praying for you, right? Then I went home and my computer was completely frozen and stayed that way for the rest of the night. The next morning, I had Internet service like nothing happened. But I started wondering about Miss Medium. Isn't it easy to say you know a lot about something no one can prove is there? If she says that spirits act a certain way, I have no idea if she is right or wrong. How does she know if she is right or wrong? To be an expert in subjective experience- isn't everybody's experience going to be different? I stand by the contention I had before she got on my carriage- if there are spirits on the other side and they can or want to communicate with us/me, how about no? How about ya'll stay where you are and I'll stay where I am? How about I choose not to experience any form poltergeist in this or any other lifetime and that it would be best to leave well enough alone? Except, obviously, if some spirit wants to pass along the winning Powerball numbers to me, that I am okay with. Other than that, death is the final act of life, is in fact, a part of the action of life but I am ensconced in Life and can generate most of what I need/want on this plane and in this world. Except the dang Powerball numbers. They have proven elusive.