Winter Is Here, Damnit.

Winter on the carriage is not the most engaging time of year for a Memphis Carriage Driver. The bright lights of Christmas, the fun of Thanksgiving, these things help ease the blow of what every carriage driver here in Memphis knows: the cold is upon us. After the joy of the holiday season is put away until next year and Thanksgiving is just a meal you had on a Thursday, January and February descend. Besides Valentine's Day, it is a bleak and lonely time, chock full of rejection, wind and no money. Precautions have to be taken lest depression enter an already bleak time. It takes longer hours of work to make half the amount of money as the rest of the year and those two months are just around the corner, leering at poor, unsuspecting carriage drivers, ready to shred our financial plans, our morale and our overall sanity to shreds. Of course, Spring will bring back the good times- the Elvis Lovers, the spring breakers, Music Fest and all that, but for now, those are the things of myths. They don't seem real and all that does seem real is that brisk wind when you work all day or all night two blocks from the Mississippi River. "Do you all work 365 days a year?" I am asked quite often. It feels like it.One day at a time, eh? :)

Why Lie?

After careful consideration, we have decided that the next time some guy who is aware that he isn't going to take a carriage ride the night I ask him to, and is, furthermore, aware that I am aware a ride isn't going to happen, yet still says,"Sure, just not now, maybe later." will be seen as a problem in need of attention and will be dealt with. The fact is, sir, your days of lying are over because I next time you lie to me, I am going to call you out in front of God, your lady friend and everyone for the sole purpose of saving your eternal soul. "Why lie, man?" is what I'm going to say. Why lie to other people, especially about commerce? I don't mind rejection, I can't. In fact, I have to use it to my advantage and let it fuel the fires of things like courage and confidence. "I don't care if you go home and starve tonight and your animals as well."- that I can handle, a straight up,"No." But a "Things are looking up for you because yeah, I can see us doing business in the future and probably tonight!" with not an element of truth in it is a lot more harsh than "I don't care if you've been driving for forever, you can't attract a ride tonight if your literal life depended on it." That's called Reality, Mr. Lying Man About Town, and I much prefer it to a bold-faced lie like the one you tell me when you bs me about a carriage ride. I choose not to be involved with lying if I can help it and I can help it. I can get you to realize that whenever you are ready to conduct business, you know where to find me. In the mean time, if you insist on rejecting all that is sacred and true on this plane of being, Ultimate Truth, well, I chose to embrace the concept of Honesty, all the time, and those that don't, well, I have no use for them.At this point, I don't even think I want you on my carriage. Redeem Yourself, Dear Sir! Go away from the naysayers of goodness and embrace proper manners in life. Straighten up your back and speak words that leave little doubt as to their truth. Say "Yes" when you mean yes, "No" when you mean no and in all manner of things, be honest.

The Present Moment: America's Most Precious Resource

I officiated my first wedding this past Saturday night. The couple, Deb and Steven, got engaged on my carriage about six months ago and after all the oohing and ahhing, I mentioned that I was thinking about getting ordained to perform marriages. Well, they called me and asked me to officiate at their wedding at the end of October, so I became ordained and am now a Spiritual Minister. (I've been walking around laying my hands on the shoulders of my friends and telling them they have had the laying on of hands. Come to think of it, most of them probably have no idea what I'm talking about because that is a bit of a Catholic thing, if I'm not mistaken. It's been a while).Anyway, I  offered for us to trailer a horse and carriage out to the county where they lived for the wedding and they were excited. So, we brought Bonnie, one of only two Clydesdales downtown and who I drove for four and a half years and a big, ole Cinderella carriage and headed out of the city. It was a welcome change from the regular attempted solicitation of rides all night. The wedding got started about thirty minutes late but it was so beautiful out in Tipton county; the Mississippi River was about a mile away and in between was what I think is called a flood plain. It was behind the house and, in fact, in front of which I stood to marry these lovebirds, and from where we were, it was a humongous bluff. Looking out, you saw the tops of the very tall trees and beyond that was the bird's eye view of an October patchwork of countryside; fields and fields of varying colors as far as the river. It was stunning, though windy and as the sun went down, colder. The bride had told me she was wearing a strapless dress so I debating taking my overcoat off, which was the only thing keeping me from shivering.The plan was a short carriage ride up to the sunset wedding site with all the bridesmaids and the bride. I figured I would wear the coat till I got to the sit and take it off while doing the ceremony. I didn't want to look all bulked up and wintery when the bride is standing there in a light dress. However, my trailer reservation partner, Tim, said,"Y'now, sometimes you have to look out for number one." I agreed and left my coat on, covering up the outfit I had spent time putting together but I was so glad I did because it only got colder as the sun went down and I still shivered a little during the ceremony. It was so beautiful to be standing so close to the two people that all the other people had so willingly and happily come from far and wide to be witnesses to the beginning of their marriage. I am a big fan of marriage (though a child of divorce after 24 years)- I  am a very happily married woman!  When I was younger, it seemed like not very many people in this country were religious. That has changed these days and I am glad it has because it offers me the opportunity to be involved in weddings without being a planner. But I still get to be involved in it and I loved it. I was surprised how moved I was by the excitement and I was right in the thick of it, so it was total fun. Wished them a happy, healthy, long marriage and we loaded Bonnie back up and set off for Downtown. Can't wait for the next one, I hope it's soon! Until later, stay well. :)

And Now For Something Completely Different...

Whether you think Obama is a socialist or not, I have one reason why a one-world government, which, correct me if I am wrong, is a very close relative of socialism, is such a disastrous idea: c. Say there was a one-world government and it fell into the wrong hands. Say they were evil hands and don't try to tell me that it couldn't happen because obviously, governments can fall into the wrong hands. Say the world fell into the wrong hands and someone decided that they were sick and tired of humans and all our constant whining about wanting peace, harmony, human and civil rights and just decided to, for instance, let the world get as bad as it can and we all kill each other off. Then they create a whole new strain of human- clones. And while they are in there messing around with human DNA, they make a few alterations, creating beings to their liking. I would think that a cloned human would have a justified feeling of innate separatism, an ingrained notion of being not of God, not of nature. And rightly so, they would not be of nature or God. So you get rid of all the people and repopulate with clones and bingo- no more problems. Factories run for 14 hours a day without complaint, the environment becomes whatever the powers that be want it to be, without complaint, the work force become human-like beings that consider themselves robots. And the few at the top, the remaining actual humans, go about their days, happy as clams, rich as can be and just not giving a rat's ass. That is just one reason a one-world government is such a bad idea. That and the fact that there would be no where to run. If something happened and you had to run with your family, there would be no where to go, no where to hide. Can you imagine? Good God.

Magic Beer

There is a guy sitting at a bar and he tells the bartender he wants a Magic Beer. The bartender serves him up one and the guy drinks it down then gets up and flies around the room several times. A woman witnesses this and tells the bartender she wants a Magic Beer, too. "Hell, make it two!", she tells him. She downs both beers, goes outside, finds the tallest building, leaps off of it and SMACK, hits the ground and dies.
The bartender looks at the Magic Beer guy and says,"Y'now, you can be a real asshole when you're drunk, Superman!"
:)

Everyone has a philosophy, right?

Well, I am officially a bad, bad blogger. I mean so well by this blog. I think about it a lot but I haven't had a blog in a long time and am clearing out space for this blog so it can grow. This blog needs to mature, it needs to express, it needs carriage rides! This time of year, they grow scarcer and scarcer, so I got a part time job to go along with my dwindling carriage rides. Autumn is also the time of year that rejection takes on a whole new meaning on the carriage line. When you ask people if they want a carriage ride and it's cold out, they look at you like you asked for a kidney. No preface, just desperate,"Hey, man- you! Hey, can you donate a kidney to me, man? I really need it and I'd really appreciate it!" They rush away from you like you were homeless and annoying. Unless the people you solicited are from Northern Climes or drunk, in which case a big blanket is enough incentive for a cooler ride. The fun is just getting started here in Memphis as we've had a few November days here recently, one of which I got to drive in, in the rain. Perhaps this blog will create room for lots of sanity for a carriage driver in the winter in a city where we have agreed there must be carriages on the street 365 days a year, unlike the companies I've seen online. They work Saturdays in the colder months. Not us, no, not one December birthday nor February anniversary will go without it's carriage ride, not here in Memphis, no sir. No, here in Memphis, we carriage drivers take care of our citizens! We make sure that  ''Im sorry', 'I love you',  or 'I miss you' are a little more meaningful and and 'I would love a carriage ride!!', a desire fulfilled.

Concentration and mental toughness are the margins of victory. 

-Bill Russell

Until next time.

\

 

How about this...

God sleeps in the minerals, awakens in plants, walks in animals, and thinks in man. 
Arthur Young 

I had a woman on my carriage recently who was a medium from Montreal. She has her own television show in Buffalo, NY and she and her male companion seemed very in touch with 'the other side'. I told her my husband's father died many years ago and she claimed that his soul was on my carriage, that s

he had goose bumps from it. She said that whenever you mention people who have passed, that it's like you are calling them on a phone and that they show up immediately. She also said that if you want a sign that the spirit you want to talk to is around, that people who have died have easy access to electronics and can easily mess around with electronic devices. I told her I would email her when I got home so she could include me in her prayer circle. You can never have too many people praying for you, right? Then I went home and my computer was completely frozen and stayed that way for the rest of the night. The next morning, I had Internet service like nothing happened. But I started wondering about Miss Medium. Isn't it easy to say you know a lot about something no one can prove is there? If she says that spirits act a certain way, I have no idea if she is right or wrong. How does she know if she is right or wrong? To be an expert in subjective experience- isn't everybody's experience going to be different? I stand by the contention I had before she got on my carriage- if there are spirits on the other side and they can or want to communicate with us/me, how about no? How about ya'll stay where you are and I'll stay where I am? How about I choose not to experience any form poltergeist in this or any other lifetime and that it would be best to leave well enough alone? Except, obviously, if some spirit wants to pass along the winning Powerball numbers to me, that I am okay with. Other than that, death is the final act of life, is in fact, a part of the action of life but I am ensconced in Life and can generate most of what I need/want on this plane and in this world. Except the dang Powerball numbers. They have proven elusive.

We Met in Memphis

Will you leave me a comment and let me know you were here? I don't mind blogging into the cybersphere but I have a feeling some people who say they are going to check out this blog actually do. But I have no way of knowing and as a Chinese Astrology Dog Sign, I am very curious, by nature. I must know. Join in on my blog (or visit me on Facebook under Horses IntheCity). You being here likely means we met in Memphis. If you were not sent to read my darling blog by a fan, then you either asked me how much a carriage ride was or else rode with me. If you rode with me, we likely talked and joked and likely talked about horses. So, say "Hi!" and that your day was enhanced in some way, per chance, by what I am doing here. Peace and Be Well!

So, you're Amish, huh?

A: So, you're Amish, huh?
B: Yes.
A: What brings you to Downtown Memphis?
B: We took a wrong turn. I shod your horse, though, about three weeks ago. Is she still picking her feet up with no trouble?
A: She is. So, are you going to ditch all you've ever known and star in a reality tv show on cable about you living in the standard, profane, modern world we all call home?
B: No.
A:Want a carriage ride?
B: (to himself: Really?) (to me): No.
A: Is it weird for you to walk around our society when you live so far outside of it?
B: No.
A: You ever miss zippers?
B: No.
A: Do you ever crave distraction?
B: No.
A: Do you ever crave modern conveniences and technology?
B: No.
A: Alright, then, nice talking with you. Have a good one!
B: Thanks. You as well.

The Need To Talk

Paying to hear me,
to be in my presence.
Should I try
to get to know you,
down-home style?
What if you don't
like me and I take it 
personally not financially?

Whatever. What if
I talk and no one listens?
Or if you don't
like the way I talk?
What I say?
I tend to enjoy
talking
for
money.

Aussies in Memphis

I enjoyed an hour ride recently with four women from Australia. I was happy that one of the 800 people who accepted my business card last weekend and swore to call for a ride actually did! This ride was one of the more fashionable I've had as all four women, two mothers and two daughters, were dressed in what I would call Artist Wear- the type of stuff I see artists wear when they are dressing up, long flowy skirts, bright colors, cool hats. One of the Aussies and I chatted about astrology (my husband is a Leo with a moon in Scorpio, I am a Scorpio with a moon in Leo), about mothers and about my boss. I told her how I consider my boss to be the best boss I've ever had, but I've never told her that. My ride told me that life is too short to not tell people positive things that you feel about them and they are right. I will let my boss know how I feel; I have been inspired! We all talked about accents and how the average Aussie does not appreciate having their accent mistaken for a Brit as,"We hate the Monarchy!" The ride ended before I could dig deeper  but this ride made laboring on Labor Day more fun than work!

4: 51 Monday, Labor Day, 2012

1. Couple of Minutes on the Carriage

   My dog growls, I say hush. Dog noses under my arm as I see the sun on my black boot. A black man walks by, alone, a huge pick-up rambles by. A fly intereferes in my personal space. A carriage pulls up next to me, a line of cars is moving towards Downtown. "In!", a driver calls to a horse. A ride is solicited and chatting occurs. A white woman in blue walks by at...

   the same time as a loud motorcycle. Hardly a cloud in the blue sky. Folks walk away from a carriage without choosing to ride. Clyde stomps his foot, then does it again. Movement all around me, drivers talk to each other. My energy is all off, kind of stressed. I stick my steel-cased pen in my mouth and click it once on my tooth. Another black man walks by, alone. Duck revelers trickle out. Keys jingle, tourists from somewhere walk by. I give other tourists directions. I hear,"Is Rondevoose down here?"

As The Carriage Wheel Turns

I had a nice lesson tonight in not judging a book by it's cover. I gave a ride tonight to two couples in town celebrating a birthday. They were somewhat average for a Saturday night ride- nicely dressed, had eaten a great meal and were seemingly nice people. What I learned while taking them around downtown was how down-to-earth they were, how genuine and funny. It made me think of their family lives and how rich and rewarding they must be. I think what surprised me the most was their senses of humor. With a well-developed sense of humor, life's problems minimize on their own. With the wives belly laughing at their husbands' jokes, I could imagine children and lawns and homes functioning with all of live's attending annoyances and stresses, but in their neck of the woods, I saw smiles and happiness and, of course, love. Maybe some rides just don't let me in very far; these folks gave me a glimpse into who they really were, not who they wanted me to think they were. It was awesome and kind of made my night. There was some 'rimz' car show Downtown tonight and the cruisers made driving a carriage a challenge, to say the least. The weather was incredible- a high of 84 degrees today- in the middle of August! I was a couple's "limo" driver tonight as they booked me for a couple of hours and I took them where they wanted to go. They had a great time, downed a bunch of mimosas and had happily dove into the stronger stuff.  I had an ever-so-slight brush with fame tonight. I was in the gift store of the Peabody tonight and saw they had a teddy bear sitting next to some chocolate guitars. I took one of the guitars and put it in the bears paws, like he was playing it. Apparently, Mrs. Lansky, of Lanksy, The Clothier To The Kind of Rock and Roll, the guy who got Elvis to wear pink and black, went into the store and liked my creation!! I almost met Priscilla yesterday but it wasn't to be. I am more interested in meeting Lisa Marie as she is actually related to Elvis. Although, I always wonder how many people on the planet right now are related to Elvis as well. Are there other Lisa Marie's out there that we don't know about? And don't most people have kids? So, the guy you meet at the coffee shop who looks a little like Elvis and just happened to sing like a bird, well, ya never know. Until another day of As The Carriage Wheel Turns...

Give the people what they want

For the fourth year in a row, we have had August weather in July here in Memphis. However, exactly where the current weather came from, I have no idea. I had a ride last night from Oklahoma City and they are not having near as nice a summer as we are. They said it was 114 degrees recently- it's almost like God just likes Memphis and decided that not only should we have a beautiful springtime but a wonderful August as well. It is a high of 84 today- last night, I wore a sweatshirt after about 10 pm- a sweatshirt in the middle of August!! Crazy, but in stating what things are like, I want the Universe to know, I am not complaining! Lots of Elvis Week people still in town, beautiful weather- I must say, I am quite happy. Got to spend some time with friends last night- it's funny how you can work with somebody on the street for years and not get to really spend time with them. Unless, of course, it's wintertime. Then, there is all the time in the world to shoot the breeze, talk about other carriage drivers (gasp!) and lament the cold. But talking with friends while out on the carriage line is a slippery slope as it can be addictive; one of the first things I learned on the carriage was how to maintain my personal space. Regular folks wanting to chat is one thing, an unwelcome carriage driver hanging around your carriage is detrimental to sales and one's mentality. With a little tact, some force of will and a smile, I have effectively learned how to be on the carriage by myself and to be unfettered by other drivers. Most drivers, I don't mind being fettered by (I thought I was making up a word and just being cute, but fettered is actually a word!) but there is the occasional person who wants to talk and talk and talk. That's what after work is for- just cause I don't look like I'm doing anything in the carriage seat doesn't mean I'm not working. I am guilty of reading while working, but that's an addiction I am happy to be fettered to. Started Black Spring by Henry Miller recently and am rather enjoying Notes From Underground by Dostoevsky, who I haven't read much by except for three fourths of Brothers Karamozov. Well, I can linger in front of the computer no longer, I must go and give the people what they want. :)


...This! This expanding moment, which has not defined itself in ticks or beats, this eternal moment which destroys all values, degrees, differences. This gushing upward and outward from a hidden source. No truths to utter, no wisdom that can be imparted. A gush and a babble, a squeaking to all men at once, everywhere, and in all languages. Now is the thinnest veil between madness and sanity. Now is everything so simple that it mocks one. From this peak of drunkenness one rolls down into the plateau of good health where one reads Vergil, Dante and Montaigne and all the others who spoke only of the moment, the expanding moment, that is heard forever...

- Henry Miller, Black Spring 1936

It's just life on the carriage.

Well, tonight was quite a bit slower than last night and with the accompanying lower amount of action as well. Told a young, white woman that if she didn't stop trying to bum money from people right in front of my carriage that I would sic the proverbial dogs on her. My husband, Chris, has had to do the same thing to her, and others, and has told me how, many times  they say they weren't panhandling when you just saw them do it. It had never happened to me until this woman said that I could call whoever I wanted because I hadn't seen crap (she chose a different word). A couple of years ago, I had a talk with one of the police officers downtown and asked him why the aggressive panhandler problem downtown was so unattended to by the police. He made the point that we don't want to make it illegal to bum money because what if you, yourself, were caught with no money and just needed a dollar or two to get home?. It is not inconceivable that it could happen to just about anyone (my husband, of course, insisting it would never happen to him) but it could. If it were illegal to bum a dollar that would make for an inhospitable world.And finding yourself without a home for whatever reason is unfortunate but that doesn't mean it is my problem. But when an aggressively-panhandling homeless person inserts his or her objectives into the area in front of my carriage (or, as I told a guy one time that he wasn't to try to bum money in front of my carriage or in front of the carriage of "anyone I know"- not sure where that came from!), then we both have a problem.
We get between six and seven million people coming downtown every year- that makes for the perfect barrel to shoot into for fish for a "homeless person". They quit selling single beers to these guys (mostly a male population) a couple of years back and that had a huge effect. I can't tell you how many times I have driven through Beautiful Court Square Park with a family ride on a beautiful day and encountered four or five grown men with beers in their hands, clearly drunk, clearly homeless. It is just inappropriate considering the amount of time, money and effort that went into reinvigorating Downtown over the last twenty years. A lot of people have worked diligently and against all odds to bring life to an old, decrepit and, by all accounts, dead, Downtown. Homelessness is a serious problem, one deserving of sincere reflection. Part of the reason it is such a problem is not just the people without homes but also the community in which in occurs.There are so many shelters in Memphis, too, and an awful lot of charity. There is a church on every block, just about, in this city of a million people. But a homeless person Downtown gets breakfast, lunch and dinner for free and an entire wardrobe from head to toe, for free, every two weeks. Nice clothes, too, from a church.
 Sometimes I think that the seemingly professional panhandlers and I really are fishing from the same waters when it comes down to it. Tourists, Memphians, Downtowners- these are the people the homeless try to ply with their sad, made-up-half-the-time story to, the stories that inevitably end in "I'm just trying to get home." Yet, when these same people walk by my carriage, I call out for their business with a resounding,"Ya'll ready for a ride?" I want your money, too. But the big difference is that I am not lying to you. My personal story has some sad in it, too, but I'm not selling you my sad. I'm selling you an honest ride with a safe driver, a healthy horse and happy Chihuahuas. The people who bum money downtown are con artists. I am not. My saleswomanship is based in truth in advertising- what you see with my rig is what you get. When I tell you I know a lot of history Downtown it's because I do. Do I know all of the history of Downtown? No, I'm not even from Memphis. But apparently know enough that most local rides I get hear the history of some part of Downtown that they didn't know. I'm not lying or conning you. The "homeless" are. Besides cops, who else Downtown sees these people for a third of almost every day? Is it fair to say I study them? I have no choice- I see them all the time, the whole time I'm at work.
     But, God love em, I can't change other people. And a far off goal for me is serenity in dealing with other people's craziness, being in that peace that let's me function in society without letting it make me nuts. However, when you decide to create a financially competitive space in front of my carriage, well, then it's on. And I will win. Why? Because I work. Because I help feed America's need to spend, on whatever. And Mr./Mrs.  Panhandler doesn't. They just take, take, take. But not tonight. No one was going to take away from the rides I sold in front of my carriage because I told Miss Hang-out-at-Denny's-and-bother-every- customer-as-well-as-anyone-who-walks-by-on-the-sidewalk-for-money-money-money to go away and not come back. Sounds harsh but it's just life on the carriage.

Mind My Own Business

When I was growing up and one of my three brothers was getting in trouble for something, I would pipe up and desperately want to know,"What did he do?". My dad would vehemently say,"MYOB!" or, mind your own business. This philosophy rings true to me to this day as I believe it leads to nothing but a healthier life for everyone involved. If my own life is far from perfect, who am I to tell you how to live yours? I believe The  Universe has a plan for everyone- I read the other day that no one can run from God for forever. Maybe a plan is in place for someone to realize God's role in their lives and then I come bouncing up, deciding that I know what's best for that person, that I, in my infinite wisdom, know more than The Universe. That is skewed and I know that part of my favorite part of being an adult is to not have other people are overly involved in my life's decisions. Can't get that Sarte quote out of my head these days: Hell is other people.
Because I give a lot of carriage rides during any given week, I wonder a lot about my role during those rides. I like to be hospitable and hopefully make people feel comfortable riding with me, but how much further is it my place to insert myself into these fine people's lives? Did they really come all the way to Memphis to see me and hear all the intricacies of my fascinating life? Generally, no. When romance is budding in the seats of my carriage, my place becomes clear- to drive and let the love happen. To show you the sights of downtown and explain, historically, where we find ourselves as we go through the parks, this all makes sense to me. But beyond that, if I mind my own business in the driver's seat and allow that God is everywhere, shouldn't people who get on my carriage be allowed to experience that hour or half hour the way God would want them to, for themselves? I quit drinking about four and a half years ago and went to AA for a while. (I'm not ruining anyone's anonymity if I out myself, right?) I believe part of my life's path is figuring out what God
wants for me in this life. But that begs the question- what role do I play in other people's lives? How far into someone else's life is it really my place to be? Suffice it to say, I am not entirely sure. But I do know that when I let God be in charge and not my ego, I tend to mind my own business a lot more and life flows more smoothly. Updates on this philosophy and it's effect on my life will be forthcoming. Have a wonderful day!

The King is Dead?

Was kind of a strange night tonight or maybe I was just in a strange place. Did lots of rides which is always nice but I felt kind of off all night. Sometimes, the difference between a weekday and a weekend night in Downtown is distinct and I think tonight was one of those nights. Lots of energies, lots of people, a whole lot of Elvis. I unabashedly admit that Elvis signs my paychecks and I am a big fan of both paychecks and Elvis. He died 35 years this coming Wednesday and people from all over the world come to Memphis in honor of that day. If he really died that day. Not sure if I mentioned this in a previous post, but I had a lady on my carriage the other day who is writing a book about the fact that she doesn't think that Elvis is really dead. She was from Australia and said that the book sold out quickly in the areas she distributed them in. I had a ride a couple of years ago and they were convinced that the whole thing was a conspiracy. After listening to them tell me why for a half hour, I have to say, it made me wonder. Most people who I mention this to, like the lady on my carriage tonight, say, "I always thought that." It feels weird to say something challenging about an iconic figure like Elvis, but it's not blasphemy, it's just a call for truth. If he is dead now, or alive, what are the rights of his fans to know one way or another? It's like celebrities saying that fame is part of the deal you make when you court that kind of success but the question always rises- where does the public thirst for personal knowledge of their idols interfere with a celeb's right to privacy? I have no idea but I do think that if the King didn't actually die 35 years ago next Wednesday, well, it's still a nice excuse to get together and celebrate his life. Until later...

"What is not in the open street is false."

"What is not in the open street is false, derived, that is to say, literature."
-Henry Miller, The Fourteenth Ward, Black Spring @1963

The technical difficulties of the last week put me off schedule with my newly resurrected blog. I think about this blog a lot as it is my latest writing project and therefore occupies a lot of time in the creative writing section of my brain. In fact, I have to be sure that life is relatively even in other areas of my world or writing obsession becomes the name of the game. When I was in my twenties, all I ever did was write. I ate, drank and slept writing- literature didn't help that situation much. In fact, I picked up Black Spring by Henry Miller yesterday and was sneaking in pages between rides all last night. There is something to reading a pocket size book by a quality author that draws me in almost without a fight, but Henry Miller always challenges me as to why there isn't a pen in my hand. An average week in my, say twenty-sixth year, would see my reading selection peppered with Henry Miller, Jack Kerouac, Alan Ginsberg, Anne Sexton, Sylvia Plath-did I mention I was an English Major? One day in my mid twenties, I woke up and realized that I hadn't created much of a life for myself as writing was my all. So, I put writing aside specifically to work on my real life. Do I have a real life now? I would say so- a loving, doting husband, wonderful pets, a job I like and every day, I have more a sense of peace in a crazy world. However, the twenty, thirty and fifty-year-olds whose lives are occupied by their occupation of our city, namely Occupy Memphis, have not seemed to be able to move past the starving artist syndrome. The need to suffer for your good is, it seems, ingrained in the human psyche, but does it need our worries in order to live? 'Never give up', 'Stay focused on your goal' and, the every popular, 'No pain, no gain'- some of these philosophies were proven ineffective back in the 80's, yet the idea of creating some peace on the inside and seeing it on the outside strikes the modern young adult as blasphemy. Security, materialism, hell, why not call it what it is- the external world is the end all, be all to the average person I meet. But it is the kingdom within that I feel is my calling, my career, my salvation. Without the ability, like Sandra Bullock's character in 28 Days said,"to just sit on a couch and be okay", to be and feel that God and The Universe approve, without in internal compass with Peace as it's True North, what does a mere human being have besides trying to stay upright in the world's tumultuous waves of fear, pain, doubt, uncertainty and all the other pressures that slam against us every day? Without God, without peace inside, without a real reality for life, what do we have? Do I sometimes have too much time on the carriage to think? Yes, yes I do. :) Until next time...

God Provides

I believe in God, in a Creator of the Universe who also made me and all people, animals, things, ideas- in short, a God that is in everything because everything comes from God. Having said that, I can remember driving on a Wednesday night a couple of years back, which, in Memphis, means Bike Night on Beale Street. Bikers from all over the Mid-South come down to Beale Street and park their bikes right on Beale (normally, no cars on Beale) and then they hang out and check out each others bikes. I have always wondered about the planning of this event. You get a bunch of bikers and bike owners (there is a difference :) standing around, drinking, socializing and then send them off on their bikes as they drive home. Maybe Bike Night should be held in a church parking lot. Anyway, it was a couple of years ago and I was bound and determined to get a ride that night so I parked on Second Street, right in front of Beale. And I sat and sat and sat... I remember thinking to myself, "This is so ridiculous...I have been driving for a long time... I'm such an experienced driver...I give such a good tour (if I do say so myself.)..." and nothing happened. No rides appeared, no money was made, it was all for naught. These days when I go out to drive, I don't beg God for money, I don't ask for rides. I think it has to do with my AA background, but I ask to accept God's will, no matter what. The hour tour that offers a five dollar tip when I drop them at their $400 a night hotel- I want to accept that as God's will for me, as part of the plan of the Universe for little Karin's life. The "made-my-night" kind of rides, also in God's plan. The hours spent trying to keep my spirits up and sound enthusiastic when a potential ride does wander by, all part of the will of God. Does this perspective really work for me? It does, when, as they say, I work the plan. When I embrace that all I do and all that happens to me as an expression of God, it makes what I see as injustices or just plain unfairness easier to swallow. Last night was no exception. With my husband still recovering from his thoracotomy, leaving me as primary wage earner, I feel the pressure but I try to stay in the present moment and maintain! Last night I only did two rides and there is no way these people knew my situation but the hand of God guided these people and they were more than fair to me. In short, it was another night on the carriage where I felt the Universe's hand extended to me and surrounding me in it's care for me.Driving a carriage and working for commission has given me so much room to grow and change. I am literally grateful not only to have a job these days, but to have a job that offers me that kind of opportunity for metamorphosis! Until later...

It was one of Those Nights

It was one of those nights where it is hard to figure out how to get enough time to go use the restroom. I always bring books with me on the carriage as sometimes it takes a long time to get a ride. But with it being so hot out and it being summertime, the rides pretty much start as soon as it's cool enough to take the horses out. My summer reading has suffered somewhat but it's always fun to drive a carriage when there are lots of people who want a ride. Had several men succeeding in impressing their birthday women- technically speaking, a carriage ride never fails to make an impression! It started drizzling last night and the ride I had were troopers about it. I had several umbrellas I bought for MusicFest last year and have never used. As the rain refused to let up, my ride put up their umbrellas and just continued to enjoy themselves. Sorry for kind of a lax entry here, but I had to get up early to go watch the ducks march at the Peabody because my brother, Dan, from Michigan, was in town with his four kids. They had aspirations of being chosen to ride the elevator with the ducks- they mistakenly thought that maybe being really cute kids (one boy, three girls) would get them the privilege of riding in an elevator with some Mallard ducks. Turns out, cuteness has nothing to do with it. All you need is $200 to make a donation and you, too, can be an assistant duckmaster. Lunch at Huey's, lots of toothpick blowing and crayon writing on the walls and they are headed back up north. Always nice to see family, especially when they do all the driving! :) Gotta hang back till the heat lets up a little today, then, I'm gonna hit it hard and heavy. Until later..

Certainly True of My Clan.

It is a beautiful Saturday in July here in Downtown Memphis. As I haven't left the house yet today and the Mississippi River doesn't run directly through my living room, I have no way of knowing how the Mighty Missip is doing today but feel safe in assuming it is not only flowing quickly South but that it is being appreciated by loving admirers just blocks from where I write this. Don't they say that humans have always congregated around rivers? Certainly true of my clan. It is slightly cooler today- a heat index of 100 degrees right now instead of 105 degrees the same time yesterday.Carriage driving is a seasonal job in that we work all year round, but driving schedules change as the weather does. A driver at my barn told me his preferred schedule, year round, was "when it's sunny". Sound about right to me. Late summertime means the day is mine and the night is spent driving. Thus, the rebirth of my blog, which is the second blog I've ever had. The first is at TheEnglishMajorMemphis.blogspot.com. I got a big kick out of blogging and have missed it- I didn't realize how much!
Had a wonderful family from Northern Alabama last night- they had the quietest eighteen-month-old baby- she was awake and looking around and seemed very content but barley uttered a sound. Must be all that country living! Drove a Memphis Grandma and Grandpa around with their Granddaughter from Nashville for her birthday.When I asked how often she came to Memphis, they answered for her- "Not enough!" :) Drove some folks from Los Angeles through our beautiful parks. We talked about Downtown Los Angeles and how, for the longest time, if you found yourself in Downtown L.A., there was no where to go for enentertainment or food, so they have revitalized Downtown and now the surrounding areas of Palisades and North Hollywood have suffered because Downtown LA is so great! I taxied two vet students for a few blocks; I pressured them a little about what they were going to do together after graduation. Someone's going to have to move somewhere! And lastly, a young couple from St. Louis, in Memphis because they like coming here. They seemed to really enjoy the ride!
So I am off the figure out what to do with afternoon hours I know won't be available to me come Fall. Much as I hate to say it, these hot, hot, hot summer days are simply better spent inside than out. The perfect time to write! Until Later~

Back in the (blogosphere) Saddle Again!

I had a nice night. I got to talk with a girl, mostly about books, for about 45 minutes. She and her husband were en route to a new home. It was nice to talk to someone about books. For three years, that's all I did all day. They say a degree in English isn't worth squat, but it was the perfect degree to have to run a used bookstore. She suggested a few authors and was one of the few readers I've talked to who, like me, reads a lot of non-fiction and for whom it takes a lot to get into fiction. It has to be really good writing and most people who have recommended a book to me because "the writing was so good", have a vastly different definition of "good". Anyway, had an hour reservation with people who listened and another ride with people who didn't. Interrupting me on the carriage when I am giving my tour is somewhat sacrilegious to me. The consequence of such rudeness means I turn my back to you and just drive. I am not under any contractual agreement to even talk to my rides. The rides that listen infinitely make up for the ones that don't, that's for sure. The heat was unbearable and then, as usual, after sunset, it was another beautiful, Southern, summer night. Sigh. Wonderful breeze of the Mississippi- not a bad night.

I Have Returned!!!

Weird. It is really strange to be resurrecting a blog you thought was dead and in the ground. I am posting a "blog" on Facebook called Horses IntheCity ( kind of a first name and last name thing) and plan on posting the same entries on here for people who don't have Facebook. I met one tonight who was just a little younger than me and was anti-technology enough that although she had a smart phone she thoroughly enjoyed, Facebook was out of the question. So this is for those folks! Enjoy!